Challenge #19 - Welcome Craftards Challenge

Hello!  Welcome!  I recently took a gamble on donating to someone else's charity drive in order to purchase an ad spot on Regretsy in the hopes that I would be able to ramp up some of my own fundraising to haul my own sorry ass up this godforsaken mountain.  So, I threw down $100 at the glorious Bronc Drywall's AIDS Ride fundraiser and secured myself a little Below the Fold advertisement.

I'm hoping that this gamble paid off and I'll be able to meet my $2,500 fundraising goal for Summit for Someone and Big City Mountaineers.  I didn't have a lot growing up because we were miserably poor and recycled more cans than I can remember.  But I did have a dad who was committed to building character by putting you through miserable life experiences.  I want these kids to be able to slog through the majesty of the outdoors and be forced to poop in the woods so that they have a leg up on someday being a functional adult - which is more than most of us will ever hope to achieve.

If, through the support of the Regretsy community, I'm able to exceed my fundraising goal I will carry with me to the top of the mountain a cherished talisman as a token of thanks and cry glitter-eagle tears at the summit..  I'm not sure what that will be yet - spectacled octopus?  Mass-produced robot charm?  Barn wood "Thank You" sign?  Organic cotton tampon "CF4L" banner encrusted with real Swarovski crysals? So many possibilities.

Thanks for your time and support.

TAKE THE CRAFTARD CHALLENGE BY DONATING HERE

Challenge #18 - The Arbor Mist Challenge

Nothing says dedication to a cause quite like being willing to drink AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF ARBOR MIST FOR CHARITY.  That's right, I'll risk alcohol poisoning and Type II diabetes just in the name of fundraising.  Donate $30 and I'll drink and entire bottle of Arbor Mist (so many choices, 14 varieties!  Exotic Fruits White Zinfandel! Mango Strawberry Moscato!  Challenge flavor is negotiable!) and live blog my thoughts on it, the world and the general unacceptability of boot-cut jeans and cinnamon flavored jelly beans.  Did you know Arbor Mist makes a sparkling variety?  Neither did I until just this second.  You know what, donate $50 and I'll drink and entire bottle of Sparkling Arbor Mist, live blog it AND jog a half mile.  WHATEVER IT TAKES PEOPLE.

TAKE THE ARBOR MIST CHALLENGE AND DONATE $30-$50 HERE

Challenge #17 - The High Five Challenge

So here's how this is going to go down.  You are going to put a $5 bill on your hand.  Then we high-five.  Whoever the bill sticks to gets to keep it.  I'm going to give it to charity but if you want to be a selfish bastard and blow it on Funyns and Doublemint gum that's your prerogative.  Fair warning, if it sticks to your hand I'm going to feel free to tease you endlessly about why your hands are so sticky.  If it sticks to mine there will be nothing to make fun of because I'm coming prepared with gymnastics rosin and Ninja Warrior Spider Walk Spray.

Highest of Fives from: http://seanwes.com

TAKE THE HIGH FIVE CHALLENGE AND DONATE $5

Challenge #16 - The Losing Bid Challenge

Remember that one time there was that one thing that you HAD TO HAVE on that auction site?  Maybe it was a deadstock My Little Pony, maybe it was Kobe Bryant's face shield.  Well now that you just freed up $67,099.99 that you would have otherwise invested in smelling like Kobe sweat and looking like a cross between the Phantom of the Opera and Vivica A. Fox in Set it Off  and you can toss at least a sweet $10 at charity.

Photo: Jesse Johnson/US Presswire

TAKE THE LOSING BID CHALLENGE AND DONATE HERE TO BCM

Challenge #15 - The Socially Awkward Challenge

Ok, I'm going to set a weekly fundraising goal of $500.  For each week I meet my $500 goal I will share with you a story from my incredibly socially awkward childhood/young adult years.  Those of you who have heard some of these stories know that this is worth it.  I PROMISE.  If you have any doubts, see challenge #14 because I was a real-life mathlete.  And in the orchestra.  Just trust me on this one.

TAKE THE SOCIALLY AWKWARD CHALLENGE BY DONATING TOWARD A WEEKLY $500 GOAL AND FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOUR RELATIVE CHILDHOOD NORMALCY 

Challenge #14 - The Mathlete Challenge

Who loves math?  YOU!  No?  ME?  Sure, kind of... not as much as I used to but whatever.  Basically there are four key elements to making my summit of Mt. Hood successful. 

 #1 - the mountain.  Check, that's been there basically forever.  

#2 - me.  I'm signed up and committed to being fit enough not to slow down the climbing group like a fat kid on a field trip.  

#3 - you.  Well you're here, so that's a good start.  

#4 - your money.  Yeah, that's the thing, isn't it?

The equation is something like (me + mountain)^(you * money) = serving underprivileged kids.  That's me plus mountain to the power of you times money.  If money is a zero and you multiply zero times anything you get a zero and you take anything to the power of zero you get the number one.  Not just me + mountain anymore, just a one. And unfortunately, the number one doesn't do a lot for the kids that need help here.  I'M JUST SAYING.  

TAKE THE MATHLETE CHALLENGE AND MAKE THE EQUATION WORK WITH YOUR DONATION